HIM: that i think i'm HER's :(

      Have you ever tried to stop falling in love because you know for the fact how hard it is to move on?You ever wonder to be happy again with a newly meet person? Do you realized how long you've been struggling for you to forget about your past relationship and then you failed again with your new one?You ever tried waiting for the right person and when you found him you start moving on again? You started moving on again and again if it isn't for you and if isn't the right time for you to fall deeply in love with your perfect guy. I call it perfect guy for i know that every girls would choose the person that would make them complete.

      I've met a man online and he was one of the perfect guy I've known online. I never expected the first day we chatted we kinda like each other and stuffs. I also can't believe that he would be as nice as i was expecting. I can't say bad thing about him for he's just perfectly nice to me. He always remind me of how he likes me and that he's thinking about me all the time. To the point that he wanted to meet me in person but our situation doesn't agreed on what we wanted to happen. I understand how hard it is, especially when we talk via skype, I myself would seriously have to adjust with both of our time difference. He's from Ontario so it's a 12 hour difference. I can feel how hard it is but i always remind myself that this happens for a reason and I am always thankful that after work i can talk to him or message him via facebook and that would help me feel happy and forget about how am i working hard at work. It helps a lot and i feel like stronger for i always have him and i can feel how near he is whenever i read his messages.

            I can still remember the first time we talked via skype that was April 3rd 2012. I was so happy talking to her coz we have a lot of common. We have our own dreams in life but we aim for the same thing and that is to be successful with we dream for. Until such time, I didn't get a message from him. So, was wondering what happened, the day after that he sent me a message saying the internet connection was accidentally broke by his landlord. So, i feel like comfortable knowing that he's fine and he's still there. The day after, he sent me a quick message saying INTERNET IS BACK but 72 hours later i wasn't able to catch him online and wondering again where he is. Then I  sent him a message again then i have no idea that he was online that time he replied that it's kinda difficult to be so far away from me and it's just hard to be away fro so long from someone he cares so much for and yeah that was the last message i received from him .Well I can't blame him from saying that to me for i understand how far we are from each other, until now i still tried to sent him a message saying how much i missed him. I realized after those days we weren't able to talk that I just wanted the truth of how he feels from me now, i just beg him of what he wanted to say on me coz i really don't want him to leave me hanging like i think i am her's.

      I don't want to make this article to have a sad ending, i honestly hate it, I always wanted a happy ending, ever!. But this happened to me and this is the real ending. I couldn't edit it coz i believe that there are people who could drop some comments about this article. I hope so. . 

You think that's a wave of goodbye? 

UNFRIEND and BLOCKED!

      Today is my mom's birthday but think I have another thing to figure out. It was a shocking news from my facebook account when I updated it. I was looking for a sample style of a scrub suit and I directly remember one person who wears the same scrub suit that I wanted also to be like mine  when im gonna go duty in ER one of these days.

      Suddenly, when I searched that friend of mine in facebook I was really like speechless for I can't find him in my friend lists. So, I was hoping maybe it was just because of the very slow internet connection. I waited for his name to load and come out of the lists but I wasn't able to see his name.

      By that time I was conviced that he BLOCKED me :). Well, there are only two things that popped out in my head and that is to believe that someone UNFRIEND and BLOCKED me in my facebook account. So now, if someone blocked me should i be very happy so that i can move on? :D or should i be sad because im starting to miss that person already? :(( 

TIRING DAY!!!

      I'm so tired of crying every night  i just can’t STOP myself crying knowing that my FAMILY is now having a problem, it's so hard to go on duty while you have a problem deep inside this is really the first duty ever that I had alot of MISTAKES!! D**N I HATE IT! i don't used to be like this! so DUMB! and WORTHLESS! Im f*cked up!!! i really wanna STOP goin to school coz even my studies were already been affected!

i MISS the days when LIFE’S BIGGEST DECISIONS could be SOLVED with ENNEY MINNIE MINIE MO :(

      I just can’t imagine that my LIFE today would be a very tiring and emotional day of my LIFE!! There comes a conversation between my eldest sister and me of course it was a family problem so i cant expressed it thoroughly here I wish somebody would catch me because im really falling now, but i promised myself i will NOT give up until i will achieve my GOAL , that is to solve the NEW problem that i am encountering now, i know its a little bit impossible but i dun wanna deny the saying EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE!! for the FIRST TIME i will make PROMISE to myself..

 I miss those days that i am with my family bonding together, especially during Christmas, new years and every vacation, i think every family member could isolate their selves because they have their own family but im not saying that they would forget us, that’s what i believe. This was also the day that i've erased my 19 albums in my friendster account and i reli dunno why , maybe just to run out lookin with the memories in my past.. whatever!! just pray for my journey… wish me luck again :(